I swear by my magickal oath that everything I’m about to tell you is exactly how i perceived it… It could all be dismissed as a hallucinated ‘ego trip’ but this is how it happened… some of it is hard to verbalize, the very nature of a mystical/magickal experience is beyond language but i’ll do my best…
I had approximately 4-5 grams of dried psilocybin (magic mushrooms), after deciding that i could do with a bit of a magickal reconnection i decided that today, 8th of March, felt right. I’d had a bit of a tough winter to be honest and had let my daily praxis grid to a halt… with the love & and support of my closest friends- (my best friend Jill had had a fantastic experience a few days previously)- i decided, with due respect, and some healthy trepidation, to go for the large dose.
I prepared fastidiously, cleaning and tidying, mopping and dusting and generally giving my studio/temple a good ol’ spring clean. i have a circle permanently painted on my floorboards and set altars in each cardinal direction, using the layout described in previous ‘Thosis’ ritual posts. I checked my almanac and saw that The Moon would be 93% full, The Sun was in Aquarius (my sun sign) and sunset would come at 5.55 local time. All good!
I fasted, didn’t take my prescribed painkillers and spent the day mentally preparing for what i hoped would be a positive, transformative experience. I had my first ‘awakening’ as a teenager on ‘shrooms and consider myself a fairly experienced user. They are not to be messed with, not at this dose, but i couldn’t wait to get started. Previously my big trips had been outside, in nature but this was really a ‘vision quest’ so i followed the standard advice for such an experience and, after doing a thorough and prolonged ‘purification and consecration’ of my sacred space with salt water and incense, performed a traditional Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram and Middle Pillar. I solemnly invoked Thoth, Isis, Horus and Hathor, my HGA Belaroth and every guide and allie i could remember. I drank the concentrated ‘brew’ with a spoonful of honey, smothered the inside of the circle with comfortable cushions and warm blankets and meditated, waiting…
i didn’t have to wait long… within 30 minutes i was coming up heavily, the candles glowed and the air shimmered with beautiful translucent colours, i could see flashes of light, blue at the edges of my open eyes and empty space took on the quality of a cubist painting, divided into pentagrams and hexagrams. i was frankly surprised at the intensity of the experience but closed my eyes and just let it happen. To my amazement the first thing i saw was what can only be described as a Gigeresque insectoid figure, it was clearly ‘mantoid’ in form, in all my years of psychedelic and ‘occult visionary work’ i’d never seen anything like this! i was thrown by this ugly looking creature and as i grappled with the shock i became aware of many other entities… i’d obviously strayed into the lower 5th dimension and was like a tourist in some ‘interzone’ marketplace. i was being harangued by ‘shells’ posing as gatekeepers, each one insisting i cut them a deal… it took a few seconds (time becomes very distorted), for me to realise i could easily be tricked into making a pact with one of these dodgy characters and had to assert my sovereignty right away. “I am Saroth the Magician and will make no pacts with any of you, begone!” i said out loud and accompanied my statement with a flourish of my ‘Thosis Wand’, I held my dagger in my left hand but didn’t need it, they dissolved back to wherever they’d come from. The mantid remained. My intuition told me that it could not harm me, didn’t want to… there was some kind of telepathic exchange and it used my name, Saroth, and politely asked if it could ‘observe’, i saw no reason to deny it so i consented, it turned so i could see its profile and upper body and saw it was wearing a sky blue cloak!
It’s hard to convey just how… multidimensional strong trips can be. I could get small breaks by opening my eyes, my circle had become a kind of glass dome/tent/pyramid! Several layers or timelines were happening simultaneously. I closed my eyes again for ’round two’ all the time energy/information was pouring into my crown chakra, every form of magickal symbol was being ‘downloaded’ and i felt intense physical pressure, like i was being buffeted by an astral hurricane. The idea came to me that i had to endure several important initiations all at once, to catch up with my co-thothers, because while they’d been working hard, i’d been slacking… The next entity i encountered was far more formidable and she was seriously pissed off!
It was a huge, female hooded cobra, again she looked very like an H.R. Giger artwork, with a female, almost humanoid face.
“How dare you call yourself ‘Holy Serpent’!” she hissed. “You have to earn that title!”. This was Mama Snake and she lambasted me for my pretentious choice of latin moniker. I was still feeling safe from any real danger but knew i had to remain in the consecrated circle. She was not some demonic force trying to hurt me, she was my mother giving me a scolding, call it tough love! i was thrown about a bit and seemed to be being pushed further and further into the core of consciousness itself. I presume she gave me some kinda initiation as well for i was eventually told (non-verbally) that i was, indeed, part of the Serpent Clan, or bloodline, which came from Cain, the product of ‘Eve’ and ‘The Light Bearer’, the biblical story has been deliberately distorted to make the Serpent Race seem eve-ill, but we are really directly opposed to the ‘Reptilian’ forces of blood sacrifice and control. Now, i know this is all rather far out! I am generally rather skeptical about all this. But, whether this was a metaphor or an allegory for some more abstract ‘truth’ i do not know, i’m just telling it like it was…
My wise and dear friend had told me to cross the Abyss, when he knew i was going to do this ‘quest’ and because it was so unlike any experience i’d ever had, i began to think that this was what i was doing… several times up to this point i had to verbally give permission for various stages of whatever the hell was happening! I opened my eyes and saw my room transformed into a wondrous palace of light, i was completely ‘in the NOW’ and i again spoke out loud “Yes, i want to cross the Abyss”. i was too high to feel fear but started to call in Thoth, Isis, Horus, Hekate and… Sekhmet.
The ancient Lion Goddess of Khem seemed to open another doorway and I saw another ‘group’, The Lion People! again they were humanoid but had flat leonine features, very like the beings from the film Avataar (which i haven’t seen) but they weren’t blue they were… lion coloured. The word Alliance came into my mind, which became ‘a-lion-ess’. I perceived that these beings were powerful, beneficent allies of the Serpent Clan… my friends face appeared, it was like he was talking to me in real time. It seemed he’s established some kind of permanent enclave in this dimension. He was like “Dude, i told ya!” and i laughed with joy at the hyper-weirdness of it all, and yes, i think i DID cross the Abyss! I really cannot describe this bit, it has to be experienced… And there is an aspect of it which i am not permitted to talk of. Not because i’m some shit hot adept, but it was part of the deal, you’re not allowed to spoil the ‘secret’ of what this entails because it would be like telling you then ending of an amazing mystery film you were about to watch!
Please don’t think i’m making claims to any kind of hierarchical grade. i’m totally against withholding information that can help people EVOLVE, do the magick with an open mind and sincerity and take the sacrament! It’s our birthrite! Ok, at this point i’m about halfway through the trip. In Part Two, things get plain ridiculous… throw in Freemasonry, Saint John the Lennon. Yoko Ono, Johnny Depp and Baphomet add some real time telepathy and a great deal of LOVE and there you have it! This post is already too long so i’ll stop there…
The Truth is Stranger Than You Ever Imagined and No Two People Will Experience IT in the Same Way
Saroth ; ))